My Manifesto.

To my daughter, Jenni - Stop choosing fucking losers for boyfriends, stop feeling bad about yourself and realize your potential. You are gorgeous, sharp, incredibly intelligent and talented. Stop selling short. LIVE your fucking life and stop hanging on to assholes and losers who bring you down.

To my son, Billie - Keep working hard and striving to do great things. Don't ever let anyone tell you that you can't. Just keep on kicking ass. Nothing made me swell with pride more than to see you perform with the Caballeros and go to the championship finals with that world class corps. You are world class. And don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

To my ex-wife - I am sorry for your pain, loss and and the things you endure now. I loved you with all my heart, even though I wasn't always the best husband. I am sorry that you turned to others for attention, when you could have saved what we had. With just a little love and tenderness and understanding. I pleaded with you until the end, to save what we had, and to be able to have a life together. It was not to be.

To my father - You are a mixed bag. On one hand, the helper. The man who always comes through. The guy who never quits. The only problem is, you took control in return. Enough said.

To my brother - After seeing what infidelity did to my family, you go and do the same to yours. You will be forgiven when you do right, and make amends. Not before. I do not hold out any hope for this, because you are weak and selfish. Our mother would fucking hate you for what you have done. You live with that shame.

To my other brother - You are wise and you have shown me so much. When I was young, I thought you were the wild one. As I have aged, I have seen your love, kindness and wisdom. Thank you for that. You're crazy, but you're my kind of crazy. I will never forget the time we spent in San Francisco. What a ride!

To my mother - I miss you more than I can ever say.

To my friends - Thank you for standing by me. Those who have. Even though I have not always behaved well. The fact that you are still here for me speaks volumes.

To those who left - it was for a reason. I may not have been the nicest person. But I spoke from my heart. You didn't want to hear it. But in the end, it was the truth. I never lied. I told you what I felt and thought. It was harsh at times. But it was what you needed to hear.

To those I have hurt - I am profoundly sorry. I will do what I can to make amends if you let me. If you won't, then I will bear the burden of my actions.

To me.

I am above all else, a passionate, emotional and creative man. My love is in nature and the birds, and I will be true to that person. I won't go to my grave as some computer expert who had a good job. I am worth more than that.