Pondering

Tonight I received a friend request on Facebook. From a girl I dated and had a relationship with after my divorce, a few years ago. The relationship ended badly (due to her deception) and was a crushing disappointment to me at the time.

I accepted the request.

Not sure why.

Maybe out of curiosity.

But what struck me after visiting her page on Facebook was that she not only had pictures of her with a man, but that she was now married.

I often wonder.

Do people want to get back in touch with you when things are going great in their lives, just to show you what you "missed out" on?

To let you know they are happy and content and "miss their hubby so much" as she says in her most recent update, as he is away on a trip, evidently.

The thing about me few people get is that after all I have endured and lost, that nothing really can phase me. It's just more shit to pile on the heap.

I am so devoted to the course of my life, in writing this book...and in pursuing my photography, that nothing is going to upset my apple cart.

It doesn't hurt me that she has moved on and found love and a husband.

I don't regret breaking up with her, and so much has happened since then that it really pales in comparison of the other life-altering events that I've experienced.

Maybe it'll be nice to be "friends" with her again, in some sense.

But what is most telling for me, is that I don't feel much.

After all this time, I was surprised to see her request, that's for sure. But I don't have any other feelings, other than just curious to know what's up with her I guess.

My perspective on life is so different now.

In the past, I would have had an emotional reaction to something like this.

Now, I just put it in the pile with the ashes from the rest of my life.

On another note, since I am pondering here....

I used to love my iPod. Even though it had an engraving from my ex-wife, it was so great to have all my tunes with me. It recently bit the dust.

So, although I am dirt poor, I finally ordered a new one, for a couple of reasons.

One, so I could have my music with me.

The other is because it supports the i-Bird application, which for me is beyond cool.

It's the new 32GB iPod touch.

I had it engraved.

Don't Ever Quit
Follow Your Dreams.